Sunday, August 9, 2009

Craft!--the new swear word

"Craft!" is a bit of a swear word at work and, consequently, at our house. It is not because I hate crafts (although I must admit I am not big on the Barbie Doll/crocheted toilet paper cover and the like). Or that I can't be crafty--I have been known to spend hours on a single scrapbook page and to wield a glue gun now and again. No, has caught on due to one of many infamous dawn-shouldn't-have-said-that moments.

barbie-doll toilet paper holder

In the name of being REAL and authentic and all that, I must admit I blurt out the occasional c-word. You know the one--it rhymes with trap. I don't think it is a particularly attractive word, and won't let my kids say it, but it does come out of my mouth more than it should. I didn't think it offended anyone as much as sounded less-than-classy. (ya think?) However, I learned fairly recently that there are some close to me that really dislike that word. So, in the name of not causing others to stumble, I try to stifle my yucky-word (or at least feel bad when it slips out). For the record, when you grow up on Long Island--the c-word IS the nice word. But anyhooo...

So, you may have gathered that I work at our church. Sometime last year several of us were invited to a church board meeting to discuss a potentially tricky subject relating to the use of our newish church building's lobby. Since opinions were varied and strong, each of those invited had a chance to share their own perspective one at a time. The others listened carefully and awaited their turn to speak. It was very civilized and we were getting a lot out in the open. One wonderful guy stated that we want to make sure that the lobby didn't end up looking like a"cr*p bazaar". I thought that was interesting, wondering which of the ideas shared so far would make it look all cr*ppy--and what is a cr*p bazaar anyway?!? I dutifully resisted the urge to interrupt and ask for clarification because it wasn't my turn. And it was a board meeting--filled with church leaders who I respect and who employ me as a ministry leader. So I must obey the rules and wait my turn. So...I wrote it down to ask about it when it was my chance to talk.

My turn came.

I directed my comment at wonderful guy, "Can I just ask what exactly you mean by cr*p bazaar?"

The room quickly went silent.

Followed by SEVERAL others correcting me at once. "He said CRAFT bazaar!"

Giggling, I said, "Oh. Well then, that makes more sense..." We all chuckled. I think a few even guffawed.

And I crawled under the table to hide forever.

Not really...I pretended I wasn't embarrassed and made the rest of my comments. (I couldn't miss the chance to say what I thought...) And knew I had to share my flub with my fellow staff members and hubby--who would get great enjoyment from the story. Consequently, they have since adopted CRAFT! along with me as the exclamation of choice when it fits. And everyone enjoys remembering the day dawn "swore" at the board meeting. A classic dawn-moment for sure.

I knew our new swear word had officially made it into our vernacular when in the middle of the night many months later, my hubby's cell phone buzzed loudly on his dresser. Confused, he sleepily stumbled across the room to turn off the alarm clock. I didn't want us to oversleep--so I blurted out--it's not the alarm, it's your phone!

"CRAFT!", he muttered, still half-asleep, as he crawled back under the covers.


Dawn said...

LOL! Love. it.

And it's so much like something *this* Dawn would do, too. Except that I happen to like to do crafts.


Kris said...

Hysterical. Oh, and if youe ver visit England, don't use the word cr*p. We did. It's a bit more offensive there. But you'll really confuse them with craft.

kimsilver said...

BAH HA HA HA!!! so funny! This is one of those sayings that develop in a funny way, and once you know the story it makes total sense, and makes you kind of chuckle every time you think of it. Kind of like when we all started saying "you are such a Merrill". (Meryl?) when someone was being less than smart :0)

Infarrantly Creative said...

Thanks for stopping by and for sharing. I am a pastor's wife myself so I can totally picture you in that context...oh that is the best. I love it. Come back and say hi again.

Hillary @ The Other Mama said...

I love this so much. You have no idea! Hysterical!

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